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The Card Thickens

The incident of strange messages arriving by mail has developed some interesting plot twists. Following a conversation with D2, I have reason to believe that Pop Pop, not Gremmy, is responsible for the bizarre communique. Exhibit A: Pop Pop sent D2’s father a Christmas card simply bearing the words, “Happy Holidays. Your children say you’re getting fat.” And Exhibit B: Pop Pop’s Christmas wishes to Granny, “Happy Holidays. I hear your husband is being ravaged by old age.” I suppose I should be happy that nothing thematically inappropriate was written in my card and I’m still on their “good list.” (As Gremmy recently related with regards to the Brown Sugar/MS Steve Martin situation, “But I WANT to be the smaller man!”)

So there you have it. Theories about WHY Pop Pop is suddenly choosing to use such blunt, colorful and inaccurate language include: not enough oxygen, too much medicinal marijuana and Gremmy-induced stress. But one thing remains certain. Due to Ma’s Christmas gifts bequest – an industrial-sized box of greeting cards from Costco – this matter remains active.


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